Friends: Your Mental Health Lifeline in the Sh*t Storms of Life
Let’s face it—life can sometimes feel like a series of unexpected sh*t storms. Whether you’re juggling school, work, relationships, or just trying to have a social life, it’s easy to feel like you’re barely holding it all together. And then there are those “what the heck is happening-to-me” moments that completely throw you for a loop. During times like these, there’s one thing we all need to survive the chaos: friends.
Yes, I’m talking about those friends who don’t just show up at your birthday party, but who also show up when you’ve had the worst day imaginable. You know the ones. The friends who listen to you vent about your boss or that person who cut you off in traffic like it's their full-time job. (Seriously, they need a medal.) These friendships are not just for fun—they’re critical to your mental health. They’re your lifeline when life tries to drown you in stress, anxiety, and confusion.
The SEW Balance Method and Core Supports
You’ve probably heard me talk about the SEW Balance Method before (if not, buckle up—this is where things get juicy). At the heart of the SEW Balance Method, we focus on three key areas to create overall wellbeing: Vital, Central, and Intentional factors of wellbeing. And guess what? Friendships fall under the Central category, which includes all those Core Supports that make you feel seen, heard, and cared for. But here’s the thing: Core Supports aren’t just friends. They also include family, loved ones, and even new connections that are growing into friendships. Whether you’ve known someone for years or just met them last week, these connections are like the emotional glue that helps keep everything together when life gets messy. Without them, we’re basically floating in space, trying to navigate life without a GPS. (Spoiler: It doesn’t end well.)
Why Friendships Matter for Mental Health
Let’s break it down with a little science, shall we? Research shows that having supportive, positive friendships can reduce stress, improve mood, and even boost your immune system. Who knew your BFF could be as important as your daily vitamins?
But more than that, friendships are our emotional safety nets. They help us weather life’s toughest storms, providing a sense of connection when everything feels disconnected. Think of it this way: You don’t just need friends for the fun times. (Although, let’s be honest, they’re pretty great for those, too.) You need them when life gets heavy. You need them when you’re about to spiral, when you’ve had enough, or when you need to hear that everything will be okay—even if you don’t quite believe it yet.
Friendships in the SEW Balance Framework
In the SEW Balance framework, friendships help power up the Central area of your life. This part of your wellbeing includes your core supports—family, friends, loved ones, community, and even those new connections that might one day turn into solid friendships. Think of it like a mental health “cheat code”—when you have these supports in place, life’s challenges don’t feel quite as overwhelming. They provide a sense of belonging and reassurance, helping you stay grounded when the world is throwing curveballs your way. Just like a car with a full battery has more energy to keep going, healthy friendships give you the energy to keep driving through life’s bumpy roads. They offer you a chance to recharge, regain perspective, and feel supported.
Now, you might be wondering, "Okay, but how do I make sure I have these friendships that actually help me?" I hear you. This is where the intentional part of the SEW Balance Method comes in. Just like you wouldn’t ignore your physical health (or, at least, I hope you wouldn’t), you shouldn’t ignore your friendships. You need to nurture them.
How to Cultivate and Maintain Friendships
Friendships are a two-way street. It’s not enough to just expect your friends to show up for you when you need them. You’ve got to put in the work, too. Here are some tips for keeping those friendships strong and healthy:
Check in regularly – Life is busy, but a quick “Hey, how’s it going?” can mean the world. No, you don’t need to schedule weekly therapy sessions with your friends, but regular check-ins keep the relationship alive.
Set boundaries – This isn’t just about personal space or saying “no” when you need to (although that’s important). It’s also about making sure you’re being the kind of friend you want to have. Don't ghost people. Trust me—people notice.
Make time – As adults, it can feel like we’re trying to schedule a meeting with the President just to get together with friends. But those hangouts matter. Whether it’s a phone call, video chat, or coffee date, make it happen. Your mental health will thank you.
Be vulnerable – Friendships thrive on honesty. Don't be afraid to share when you’re struggling. Opening up doesn’t make you weak—it strengthens the bond and creates deeper trust.
The Bottom Line
So, let’s recap. Friends aren’t just your social circle. They are your emotional pit crew. Your stress-busting, mood-boosting, life-stabilizing safety net. They help you stay grounded when the world is spinning out of control. And when you combine these relationships with the intentional focus on balance from the SEW Balance Method, you’re not just surviving—you’re thriving.
So the next time you’re feeling like life’s throwing a storm your way, take a moment to reach out to your friends, family, loved ones, or anyone in your circle. They’re there for the mess, the tears, and the celebrations. And if you're feeling down, just remember: your friends are your mental health MVPs—no cape required.
By Lepa Modie, SEW Balance Founder & Licensed Therapist