Finding Gratitude in the Eye of the Storm: A Therapist’s Guide to Weathering the Darkness with a Smile
When life throws you into the middle of a storm, it can feel like you're hanging on by a thread – and not the pretty, sparkly kind, but the kind you find frayed at the bottom of a bargain bin. Yet, believe it or not, there’s one thing that can help hold that thread together: gratitude. Sounds a bit like finding glitter in a landfill, doesn’t it? But as a therapist and a seasoned navigator of life’s “shit storms,” I promise you that gratitude is a game-changer – a tool to reset your mindset, refocus on what you can control, and, yes, even put a bit of pep back into your step.
Why Gratitude Works Even in the Dark
When everything seems to be going haywire, gratitude works as an instant mood boost. Think of it as emotional first aid – a band-aid for the soul. Here’s the magic: by actively looking for the good, we take the focus off the mess for a moment and give ourselves something positive to hold onto. Gratitude reminds us that while we may not be in control of everything (hello, life), we can always control where we place our attention. This doesn’t mean you’re ignoring the hard stuff; instead, it’s like saying, “Okay, life is really messy right now, but there’s still something good here, no matter how small.”
Gratitude and the ‘Sh*t-Storm Survival Kit
Let’s get practical here. When you're in survival mode, it helps to have a go-to list of things you're grateful for. Start with the little stuff – the things we often overlook. Maybe it’s the first sip of coffee that tastes like sanity, or the way your pet greets you at the door like you’ve been gone for years when really, it’s just been an hour. These tiny moments of appreciation act like footholds, helping you climb out of the mental quicksand.
Here’s a challenge: try writing down three things every day that you're grateful for. Yes, every day. Do it even if it feels silly, even if you’re only thankful for finding both socks this morning. Soon, it becomes a habit, and eventually, it turns into a source of strength.
The Science-y Stuff (Brief, I Promise)
There’s science backing this up. Studies show that gratitude increases serotonin, the “feel-good” chemical in the brain, and helps lower cortisol, the stress hormone. Essentially, when you practice gratitude, you’re giving your brain a gentle reminder that life isn’t always all doom and gloom – there’s still light filtering through. It’s like flipping on a tiny switch in your brain that says, “Hey, maybe things aren’t so bad after all.”
This is why gratitude is one of the core factors of the SEW Balance Method and is measured on the SEW Balance Assessment—because it’s more than just a feel-good practice. Measuring gratitude helps us see how small moments of appreciation build resilience, anchoring us in balance when life is at its messiest.
Finding Joy in Small Things When the Big Things Feel Broken
Sometimes, life can feel like a parade of mishaps, and big wins may seem out of reach. This is where gratitude can shine because it doesn't require big moments; it thrives on the small ones. Maybe it's the fact that your friend texted you a hilarious meme just when you needed it, or that you managed to resist snapping at someone during a stressful day. Celebrating these small victories can be a powerful way to build resilience and keep hope alive when the going gets tough.
Encouragement from a Fellow Sh*t Storm Survivor
I’ve been there, clinging to every shred of gratitude like it’s a life raft. So, here’s my word of encouragement: lean into it. Even when it feels pointless, even when the only thing you can muster is “I’m grateful for my cat,” lean in. Gratitude is not a cure-all, but it’s a heck of a tool for staying grounded, for lifting our spirits, and for finding a bit of grace, even when life is anything but graceful.
Take it from someone who’s seen storms come and go – gratitude isn’t about ignoring the storm; it’s about remembering that even in the downpour, there are still reasons to smile.
By Lepa Modie, SEW Balance Founder & Licensed Therapist